Types of People Who Will Attend Your House Party and How to Deal With Them
If you decide to throw an open invite house party, these are the types of people you can expect to attend and handy ways to deal with the troublesome of the bunch.
• The Early Bird: arrives early and sits on your couch awkwardly watching television while you run around the house trying to set everything up;
• The Late Comer: arrives late, doesn’t understand how you could have possibly run out of chips already, isn’t drunk enough and doesn’t participate in the shenanigans. Better left in a corner;
• The A*hole, part one: can be a major headache if you don’t calm him down or kick him out when he gets enraged for whatever reason;
• The A*hole, part two: arrives early, leaves last, eats a lot, breaks your mother’s Egyptian vase and does not help cleaning. This one is incorrigible;
• The “Best” friend: will only help with the cleaning if you set him up with the hot chick from Algebra;
• The real Best friend: will be the one yelling at whoever’s playing dodge ball in the kitchen;
• The Sloth: you can find him passed out drunk on the staircase by 2AM. Will only be a problem if he has to be shoved into a taxi;
• The Unknown: you never saw these people before. You’ll never see these people again;
• The Blink-And-You’ll-Miss-It: the first time you see this couple will be upon arrival. The next time will be leaving the bedroom you forgot to keep locked;
• The Life of the Party: will be cracking jokes in the kitchen, socializing in the living room and organizing competitions in the yard. Probably all at once;
• The You: will be wrecked, with a sore throat from screaming at people not to do what they were doing, and borderline depressive from all the cleaning left to do in the morning.